Dawn's Notes
Up and Down and Up and Down - May 2026
by Dawn Phelps, RN/LMSW
On October 29, 2021, my little sister Joan who lived Fairbanks, Alaska died. Her death dealt a devastating blow to our family. Soon after her death, there was a small service for her, but her funeral service was postponed until late spring when the cemeteries would reopen.
My niece’s husband, also in Alaska, died in February of 2022, and his service was also delayed, so both services were scheduled for a weekend in June. My husband and two other family members made plans to fly to Fairbanks and attend both services. My husband and I met our family in western Kansas and drove to Denver where we parked the car before our flight. Our trip to Alaska was sad as well as tiring with a time change and 24-hour daylight in Alaska. We attended both services and spent time with family and friends of my sister. We also squeezed in a brief visit to North Pole, Alaska, and a visit to the Pipeline where we took photos at midnight.
By June 13, we were finally ready to head home—sad, tired, and weary. We checked out of our rooms, drove to the airport in Fairbanks, and discovered our flight plans to Kansas had been changed. So, we sat in the airport until morning then flew to Washington, Utah, and on toward Denver, Colorado. All went well until our plane began flying over the mountain range west of Denver. There the plane encountered a strong tail wind and very strong air currents. Our pilot announced. “We are going to experience some turbulence on our way down! Everybody, buckle up!” No one was supposed to get out of their seats.
The pilot was telling the truth, but he had minimized what was ahead! We were quickly aware we were in turbulence, but the real trouble began when our plane began its descent from about 30,000 feet to the Denver Airport below. The turbulence was so bad that the plane began to shudder, bump, and rock from side to side. It went up and down and up and down, sometimes dropping several feet! I felt like a miracle the wings were staying attached! All conversation in the cabin ceased, and we all “hung on” for the ride.
I, like many of the other passengers, wondered if our plane could make it to the ground safely at all. And the jolts continued as the plane lurched up and down and up and down. I believe many others on our flight were quietly praying—I know I was. It felt like the plane might break into pieces! I prayed for the pilot to have the skills needed to maneuver the plane and for the plane to hold together. During the turbulence, no one could be heard talking except for a little girl with coal-black hair in the back row of the plane with her family. We were sitting in the row in front of her.
As our plane was being tossed around as it descended, the little girl cheerily proclaimed, “I love it!” Then she loudly proclaimed, “This is the most funnest thing!” and she described our situation with “up and down, and up and down.” Her voice was clear for all to hear, and her response was so unique for such a scary situation that I could not help but inwardly smile. Then she said, “I’m not stressed yet!” and she wasn’t. She was joyous as we prayed, while our plane was being bounced, bumped, and jolted by high winds and air currents! She was oblivious to the danger we were in!
Our plane did make it safely to the ground. And as we were getting off the plane, the grandmother and I briefly spoke. I said, “She wasn’t stressed, but I was!” Her grandmother agreed that she too was afraid. Life is made of ups and downs that are not fun. Contrary to what the little girl said, we do get stressed, very stressed sometimes, and it is difficult to relax and find joy amid a storm in nature or a storm of grief after a loss.
Even during the tough times, when our “planes” are bucking up and down and up and down, perhaps the best thing we can do it pray and trust that we will safely make it through our storms and the ups and downs. The good news is that storms don’t last forever, and planes do land despite storms. A Japanese writer Haruki Murakami said, “When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in.” That is true of those who have survived a storm on a plane, or those who have made it through the loss of someone they love.
When the storms of life get scary, just hang on! Storms don’t last forever, and you can make it through life’s bumpy “ups and downs.”
“Remember, no storm lasts forever. Hold on. Be brave. Have faith.
Every storm is temporary, and we are never alone.” Author unknown.
Call about the next "Living Life after Loss" Group at:
Meadowlark Hospice
709 Liberty, Clay Center, Kansas
(785) 632-2225
Dawn Phelps, RN/LMSW, Group Facilitator