Dawn's Notes
Three Hearts On A Twig - May 2018
by Dawn Phelps, RN/LMSW
During a recent visit, my oldest sister Joy showed me a small branch, scarcely larger than a twig. It was about one-third inch in diameter and about 10 inches long—a smooth, straight branch carefully selected for a purpose.
Three small hearts were meticulously carved on the twig, and Joy told me its story. She said our daddy had carved the three hearts on the twig and had given it to her when she was young.
As Joy slowly turned the branch, she pointed out the three hearts. Perhaps she could imagine Daddy searching for the just-right twig and carving it with his pocket knife.
She said, “Daddy said one heart stood for Mama, one for him, and the little heart stood for me.” He carved the hearts when Joy was small, when they were just a family of three.
Later there would be six more children born, but the twig spoke loudly of my daddy’s pride of being a first-time father. Joy said, “It is one of my most precious things.”
She showed me the twig when we were working on inventory of her household possession. As I typed other items into a laptop, she made remarks such as, “Mama bought me that basket,” and she spoke of memories connected to the now-silent old mantle clock that my grandmother once owned.
The old treadle sewing machine brought back memories of her hours spent pedaling and stitching dresses for her younger sisters. Her hand-woven oak baskets reminded her of the hours that she and her late husband Richard searched for each basket—their special trips together.
Perhaps you, like my sister, have memories that help keep your heart connected to your loved one who died. Perhaps it is a place that you shared together, a food, or a special holiday.
Or maybe you are reminded of your loved one by a fragrance, a season, a sound, or a song. Perhaps you keep a photo, a piece of clothing, or a small object near to help bring back the memories, the good times, you shared.
After someone dies, our memories are precious connections to the one we love. “When someone you love becomes a memory, that memory becomes a treasure” (author unknown). Take your memories with you—they are your treasures.
By Dawn (Thorn) Phelps RN/LMSW
Call about the next "Living Life after Loss" Group at:
Meadowlark Hospice
709 Liberty, Clay Center, Kansas
(785) 632-2225
Dawn Phelps, RN/LMSW, Group Facilitator